Entry 2 (4/23/2025)
I know what I want this site to look like, but I don't really know what to put on it yet :C
I know what I want this site to look like, but I don't really know what to put on it yet :C
I'm going to try and not yap on theses too much. I'm setting up a personal work limit of 250 words, so these don't become essays. I been thinking about this site, rather the idea of this site..since nothing is on it at the time I am writing this. I'm very scared of making a site. But I realized I like learning HTML and programming in general. There I been so many times I have wanted to learn this as a hobbie since 2017-ish? But I have been scared and too anxious about my ability and what to made. I really want to get into electrical engineering, computers, and making things. But I have been so focused on other people--that I forgot that I have the potential to make things. I've been told so many times that others are just buildt to be better in techinal things--math, coding and engineering that I complete gave up the idea of even trying to get into things that generally interested me. The purpose of my website, is the hope to continue working in these areas that interest me that may not be my strong suit. I love the idea of inventing and making new things. And I am tried of being dispointed that I gave up certain hobbies. I don't expect to be the best the world. I just want to get back into my hobbies, so that's what this website is going to be.
Hi again! It's been a bit! I've been doing so much planning for this website. From the aesthetic to the mascot. I actually have time to work on this website for a few months..so hopefully, I can get some progress and actually get things up and running.
I have been very sick for the past 3 weeks, so I haven't been doing anything..I set out to do. I have decide to join art fight--which this this little online art competition that happens in July. I have been working on my ocs..so there's that. As I write this, I have a CSS tutorial pulled up.. so things are getting done. Very slowly though.
The other day I made a toyhouse...I don't think it's for me. but I really like the idea of having
little profiles for all my ocs. This is a feature I want to add to this website.
IDK what I will do with my current toyhouse since deleting an account doesn't seem easy. Also,I upload some of the pages to neoctities!
I have been working in VScode for months, and decide that seeing my code on neocities might help me feel like I'm making progress.
I'm all set with HTML, but CSS seems so intimidating. I have decide to actually stop
watching video tutorials, and actually look for websites designed for learning programming.The video I mentioned in my last entry..got
very confusing, very quickly. However, I will say, learning HMTL has benefited me, it actually really fun/cool to
understand some of the code,
I see in websites, and be able to write things in HTML--if a website (ex: AO3) lets you do that!
Addtionally, I have to do a major overhaul on my website, because I had incorrect synatx on almost everything
..so I will try my best to correct my code as I go from now on! We all have to start somewhere, afterall.
I am feeling pretty let down. I am trying to learn a lot of new hobbies, like I recently started playing video games again. Mainly Persona 3 and Gulity Gear Strive, but man being bad at something is such a annoying exeprience like I forgot what it feels like to be a beginnger at something. Perhaps, it's because I have only really had a few hobbies. and have been doing them since I was young...but it seems everytime I pick up something, if I'm not an expert day one. I get very frustrated and give up. This website, fighting games, driving, and volleyball are all starting to be examples of that. I am trying to be more malleable to new skills and learning. I guess in a way I gotten in my head that I know it all...despite not even being like 30 yet. Whenever I do get annoyed with my new hobbies. I always see myself coming back to my old ones...mainly art. I guess it has just becoming a very therapic for me...like the same way, people find long drive at night relaxing.
I got a lot done for this little website over the last few days! Which makes me very happy, I have been have a lot of fun programming everything. Also, I change the aesthetic of this website again. I don't have anything in the CSS. Yet, but I want to be sure of my aesthetic before I commit to the CSS. My two main contender are a tropical beach aesthetics or powerful sea monster final boss. I have mascots associated with each idea, and I even thought of a layout for the beach theme, but I feel bad leaving the sea monster idea behind.Both themes are based on some very old ocs, that I am trying to find something do with. I think the beach vibe could become a seasonal things, if I want to do that. Because I want web mascot with a water theme and is fantastical. I haven't posted anything of my ocs, yet but literally all of them are based on fantasy of some fantastical concept. Actually. I got it. I know what do.
Hello! I have been working on my art fight reference sheets for the past 2 days again, I am happy I worked on
them now rather than later in the month, because it has me very burned out from drawing.
Oh, IDK if I mentioned this but I got into
FF16 recently. I actually bought the artbook as well, and it came in today!! It's so fantastic. I just want to
spend my time looking at it. It so inspiring to me. I feel like it's not often that you see concept art that feels like the concepts/
the roughs. I feel like a lot of art books I have seen attempt to make the designing stage of a project look very polished,
and it's not often you see the rough/brainstorming ideas. After seeing the concept art for this gamem, I feel
very inspired knowing that my concept art for my projects doesn't need to be A++ illustration, as long as
I know what I am making it's okay. I don't know sometimes I get so overwhlemed that my creative brainstorming
doesn't look as pretty as everyone else. Even my art doesn't look how I aspire it to look. I am learning how to render
for the frist time in 5 years, and it feels like I am starting from strach.
To me my sketches look great, but my coloring and rendering are terrible. I feel quite sad about it.
It's leading me to push back a lot of my creative projects because I want my art to be at a point
where I can replicate the vision I have in my head about it or at least be 80% of what I imagined my
project to be. I am definitely getting too long! C U later!
I've been unable to work on this website for the last 3 days.
I've been very consistent on working on it every two days or so.
Addtionally, I won't be able to work on it for the next 3 days either. I have been having a lot of
problems with making a dyanmic layout for this website. Like planning
CSS was so fun, but prorgramming it isn't. I have the vibe in my mind, but there are so many
features I want to add.
I want my internal code to follow the industry standard for CSS, HTML, and Java,
features like being accessible to other devices and screen readers, etc.
Being able to access a website on a mobile device is very important to me. So many of the
sites I use for college aren't like that *cough* pearson *cough* and it sucks I can't do my homework
on the go. (That makes me sound like a nerd)
Also being accessible to people using screen readers is something I want to do. There are
some things, people forget need to be accessible to everyone when you aren't being personally effected by the
inaccessiblity. I want to be more conscious of this.
CSS has a large learning curve and it's making me sad because HTML felt so easy at first.
I won't give up because keeping this diary and having a vison make me
want to see this website though.
I changed my site name and user today. Beacause I was having trouble spelling my old one.(this is the secondtime) This one is simple and it reminds me of two of my art inspirations: Mugenoumi and Meshigaumai! I also have finally setted on a idea for this website. I want it to look like a painting. Very high constrast. I am also thinking of building seasonal CSS. So for summer the CSS is summer themed. I have to make so many art assets now, but I think it will be easier this way.
It's all coming together. I am like so happy! Like I have been struggling so hard with
the layout of my site, and deciding a theme--it's unreal!! I would upload it in it's current state with
just the landing page I put together, but while trying to figure out the layout I messed up the actual homepage.
It's going to be my next target--then I will fix up my "about me" and go from there. So happy, but must sleep.
I also really like the painting idea. I mentioned last entry. I have been trying to invison a theme that feels true to
me. I have always struggled with finding a persona/personal branding as an artist. But I am really like the painting
idea. Art has always been a very big part of my life, and by extension painting has become something I find really
calming. Like I said earlier must sleep, but too excited!
It's like 12 hours later, I have slept. I really wanted to explain some things more After reading some old entries. I
want to mention I deleted my art fight & toyhouse. Art fight feels very stressful
to me I have tried it twice. Toyhouse makes me feel the same way. I want to have a very calm/relaxing time on the internet
As I have gotten older, I have become to really enjoy the quiet moments of my life. I feel like paintings are like that.
That ideas also really draws me (pun intended) to the theme. I gotta go. Later!